Sustaining Momentum

I had a decent day yesterday. I was a bit busy at work so I didn’t do much writing, only updating my book blog. In the evening I started working on my big school assignment of the week, but after watching the target video I only tried to do the actual writing for about 45 minutes. So it was a modest investment of time, but I’m mostly satisfied with it. Finishing the assignment today to meet my goal will definitely be a stretch though. I think I’ll change it to noon tomorrow.

I danced yesterday, but I was discouraged at how badly I did, and end up spending nearly half the time just doing exercises. I need to review the instructional videos to figure out what I’m doing wrong, and I had intended to do so yesterday but I ended up watching another video about a guy speaking different kinds of Chinese in Chinese restaurants in New York and filming the other (Chinese) customers’ reactions. It was amusing, but the guy’s cocky attitude rubbed me the wrong way.

Anyway, as I was dancing and while cleaning afterward I thought about my goals. This week I’ve done really well and I’m proud of myself for that, but I’m concerned about sustaining this momentum. In my coursework I’ve been reading about self-efficacy—the belief in one’s ability to change one’s behaviors so that certain standards or goals can be reached. An important part of building self-efficacy is being reminded of one’s progress. I have tried to create systems for this purpose, but except for the first half of 2012 when I kept charts of time spent on language learning, I’ve never had significant success. I would like to program something eventually, but for the present, I want to direct my programming energy toward my memorization program. So, when I get the time, I’m planning to look for a way to do this. I’ve used Habitica before, but I didn’t find the effort that I invested in the RPG aspects to be proportionately satisfying (though that was during the alpha stages, so it might be worth another try). There’s also spreadsheets, which is what I used in 2012, but they require more effort than I like to render my results discernable.

In the past, my language goals have revolved around reading. Reading has many levels though, and being able to run your eyes over all the words on a page and formulating some idea of how they come together in meaning can be a long way from actually comprehending a text (as I discovered from this year’s Japanese test results). I’ve also found that reading does not have a significant effect on speaking fluency. So I was thinking that this year, since I’m gradually producing more English writing, maybe I can branch out my skills to be able to produce writing in another language as well. Production is its own proof of achievement.

Along with that, I’ve been thinking about language learning again. I don’t think I can or should stop learning a language completely. My plan was to wait until halfway through this year and then if I had time, I would return to studying a language, but it’s too strange to me. So the question is, which language should I study? Japanese is the most sensible answer for the present, as I am living here and I can practice (somewhat) easily if I try. I even have someone who would probably check my Japanese writing. Also, I still have not achieved my goals of being able to comfortably read visual novels and passing the JLPT 1. On the other hand, those goals no longer mean a whole lot to me. I’ve lost a lot of interest in anime and even visual novels, and from my current vantage point the number of jobs in Japan that will appeal to me in a year and a half is quite small. My next idea is Spanish. If I decide to teach in the US, Spanish would be my first or second choice of subjects. There are lots of resources available and if I am determined enough I could certainly find a way to practice it in the USA. If I don’t stay in the US though, I don’t see it being very useful. Finally there is Arabic. If I leave the US again, I will prioritize going to an Arabic-speaking country, and the sooner I get started the better. However, I’m not confident in my pronunciation or my capability to find someone to help me with it, and without that base I can see myself being easily discouraged.

Writing it out like this, I think I can eliminate Arabic from the possibilities, at least until I get back to the USA and find a tutor and/or some more motivation. I would really like to work on Spanish and take a test, because while I have a degree and living experience in French, a certificate and experience in Japanese, and experience in Russian, I have no proof of Spanish skills whatsoever. I feel like I could have a conversation in Spanish with a little study, and I know that I can read and understand Spanish texts. However, I will have to speak Japanese in the next two months, and I don’t want to get mixed up, so I think I will study Japanese while I am here. I will use my grammar textbook to create sentences and ask O-Sensei about them.